Fighting, Surviving, Living
by alindy
Summary: "I said your name because before the black took over and everything went out and it was dark I was thinking of you. I had been trying to find you, to tell you…" "Tell me what?" "Tell you that I love you" FOR SIMPLYSOMETHING contest winner :


**This is for the lovely SimplySomething who won my Flatline Contest. She requested Lavender/Ron and her wish is my command!**

**I don't normally write this couple, so don't hate on me, please, haha (:**

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><p>Lavender ran as fast as her legs would take her and was glad that for once she had chosen practical shoes that morning as opposed to the numerous pairs of heels and slip-ons she owned. A spell whizzed right by her left ear and she had to tell herself that now was not the time to let it get to her, to scream or yelp. Running, running was what she had to do and she couldn't get distracted. For the first time in her life, she realized, she didn't really even care what she looked like despite the fact that there <em>were<em> boys around her.

Fighting for your life can do that to a person.

But she wasn't going to let that stop her fierce running in a direction she hoped would take her to him. She knew she could die, that it was maybe more likely than living, but she couldn't die before she saw _him._ Lavender wasn't running away (from Deatheaters, from danger, from her death), she was running _to_ (him). If she died before she got to tell him the startling revelation she had come across in the last few months she didn't think she could die happily. She wanted to at least be able to do that.

Transitioning around a corner and trying not to slip on any of the debris flying from the wall that had collapsed to her right, she saw someone she recognized. It wasn't anyone she was close to, that she talked to or was friends with, but to see _someone_ was helpful. It was someone who was alive and safe and very _not dead_. Sure most of the time she thought she was crazy, but to know that someone she knew was alive made her hopeful and sane.

"Luna!" Lavender called, stopping for a second and trying to get a breath. "Have you seen Ron?"

"Several seconds ago, I think. He was in that direction," she pointed behind her. "Have you seen Neville?"

"Last I saw him he was looking for you," she smiled at her.

"Well I better find him then, shouldn't I?" Luna smiled and Lavender realized that she had never looked more beautiful with her hair in a million directions and the dirt and blood covering her face, her perfect white teeth shining through; she looked like a warrior of the best kind.

"Yes, you better," she nodded in return; starting to jog away in hopes that she wouldn't be too late.

"I hope you find him!" Luna yelled at the figure running away.

"You too!" she belted over her shoulder, turning right down the split corridor just because it felt like the correct thing to do. The more she ran the closer lavender realized she was getting to the heart of the battle that was taking place. She passed more dueling pairs and had to dodge more spells that were coming heart-stoppingly close. A purple beam of light hit the side of her stomach and she felt a large cramp-like tightening take over her side. Lavender stopped and sent a curse back at the guy she suspected of having caused her side cramp and hit him straight on, sending him flying into the wall. The cramp lightened as she saw him unconscious and she started running again.

"Ron!" Lavender yelled, so happy to finally see him. He didn't turn but she moved with a new sense of purpose as she saw him talking to Harry, sending several spells at potential threats, as it seemed they were planning.

Suddenly, a claw seemed to grab her back and a weight launched itself onto her body. She hit the ground with a loud thump and the first thing she thought about was how badly the bruise was going to look. As Fenrir Greyback smiled in the most grotesque of fashions down at her she continued to hold onto that thought: the bruise. Fenrir held her down despite her kicking and shrilling and crying and she realized that she couldn't get him off as he began to sink his teeth into her neck. Her wand was out of reach and she resigned herself to thinking about that bruise.

It was keeping her sane as she realized that she _wouldn't_ get to tell him, that she was dying and no one was there to see or help or do _anything._ The bruise, she forced her thoughts to stay there because it wouldn't make her as pitifully depressed, probably wouldn't be able to be covered with makeup easily. Maybe Parvarti would know some beauty charm that would help or she could find some cute shirts that would cover it up well. The only thing keeping her sane as he gnawed on her flesh and the pain rippled through her body and the blood stuck into her hair and she felt him touch her in a place she had never even been touched was the bruise. And Ron. Her mother had always told her that love would be the death of her: she had never thought it would be so literal.

"No!" Lavender could hear a familiar voice yell but in her haze she couldn't think of who it was. Her mind felt heavy and her body couldn't move no matter what she did. The weight was off of her suddenly, but she still felt glued to the ground and incapable of proper thought. She felt like she needed to get up, she needed to do something, she _had_ been doing something, but now she couldn't seem to remember what it had been. Had it been important?

"Lavender, please, Lavender, are you ok?" that same voice said. Lavender tried to look up and see but she could only see the flash of brown eyes and bushy hair, the voice was most definitely feminine. Suddenly it clicked: Hermione Granger.

"I- uh," she gasped. Her voice had come out barely louder than a whisper and she hadn't realized how much it would hurt as she tried to force words out in coherent thoughts. "Ron…"

And then all was black.

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><p>Hospitals had always made Lavender feel uncomfortable ever since she was little. It probably had something to do with watching loved ones deteriorate here, the smell of death alerting you to the fact that it was going to happen but still not wanting to admit it to yourself. There was nothing worse than watching someone you love and not being able to do a single thing about it, but Lavender knew she should at least be happy that she would be going out of this building at some point, that she was on the recovering side as opposed to the dying.<p>

"Ms. Brown, how are you feeling?" the Doctor she still couldn't remember the name of asked her.

"I'm not dead," she spoke out quietly, speaking too loud having become something that hurt to do.

"You are _not_ dead," he smiled at her. "We worked pretty hard on some of those lacerations you obtained and tried our best to diminish any bruises. You lost a horrible amount of blood so we gave you a blood-replenishing potion. You're looking pretty good so we think we can probably send you home in a day or two as long as you have someone to help watch out for you."

"Ok," she nodded. The effort to talk still seemed hard and so she closed her eyes and turned away from him, hoping he got the message.

He did.

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><p>The next time Lavender woke up several familiar faces were there by her bedside. It was a strange group of people, one she hadn't ever thought she would be so joyed to see by her bedside, but she was. The familiar faces and happy smiles made her feel lighter rather than the consistent heaviness that always seemed to be in her body. She looked around and observed all the faces: Ginny, Luna, Hermione, and Parvarti sat by her bedside.<p>

She didn't ask where Padma was: she had a feeling she already knew.

"You're up!" Parvarti explained.

Lavender nodded, trying to lift herself up so she could see them all better but wasn't able to get too far by her own means. Luna saw her struggle and helped her up, putting an extra pillow behind her so that she could be apart of the action.

"How long have I been out?"

"In total you've been here for a week," Ginny supplied.

"Really?" Lavender exclaimed. She had never contemplated how long she had been out and how bad her wounds had been.

"Yes, but you've only been asleep for a few hours."

"The Doctor said that you can probably go in a day or two," Hermione supplied.

"He said that I could go if I have someone to watch after me," Lavender explained. "I don't."

"Oh, don't worry about that," Ginny shook her off. "My mom said you should stay at Grimmauld Place. There are plenty of people there right now, just because they don't want to be alone. We'll all help take care of you."

"Thank you," she said gratefully at all of them, slight tears prickling at the back of her eyes. She turned towards Hermione, looking at her deeply in a way she hoped she understood, "thank you."

"No problem," Hermione answered, "what are friends for?"

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><p>"Dean! Seamus!" Lavender smiled as she sat on her made Hospital bed. "I didn't know you guys were coming to pick me up!"<p>

"Of course we were," Seamus responded, "we couldn't wait that long to see you. The girls told us we weren't allowed to see you by request several days ago."

"Well, I know it sounds pretty vain, but I looked completely horrible. Also, I was in a pretty bad mood, I don't think you would have liked me very much had you been around me," she said bashfully.

"We're your friends, Lavender, we don't care what you look like," Dean explained, grabbing Lavender's small bag of belongings and walking them to the desk to check her out.

"I know, I'm sorry," she shrugged. "I'm glad to see you two now, though."

"We're glad to see you too," Seamus smiled at her.

After they checked out they walked towards the exit, Lavender a little slower than the two of them because of her side laceration. "Is something going on between you and Luna?" she asked Dean, who blushed as she said it.

"He wishes," Seamus barked out, a hearty laugh echoing around them.

"So not yet?" she asked.

"Not yet," he shook his head. "She's special, she deserves to be wooed."

"You are so in love," Lavender said surprised. "You just used the word 'wooed' for Merlin's sake."

"He totally is. I'm the one who has to hear it _all the time_. He is like a lovesick puppy, it's disgusting," Seamus stated.

"Oh, you're no better," Dean defended himself. "You're all "Parvarti this" and "Parvarti that". At least I admit that I'm totally head over heals for the girl."

"Boys, boys," Lavender said, putting her arms around the two boys' necks (having to step on her tiptoes so she could properly reach Dean). "It seems to me that you have missed the help of the amazing Lavender. I would be happy to help you woo your ladies," she said, giggling after she finished.

"We _have_ missed you," Seamus replied, putting his hand around her waist and smiling along with the other two. Lavender beamed at the two of them, forgetting for a second about the nightmares that filled her nights with the haunting images of being held down and the sound of your own flesh ripping and the feel of your own blood stuck in your hair.

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><p>"Oh, Lavender dear, I am so happy to see you," Mrs. Weasley ushered her into the house. "The girls told me that you were going to stay here and I set up a bed just for you! You'll have to share a room with Ginny and Hermione but I hoped you wouldn't mind. It'll just be like Hogwarts all over, right?"<p>

"Right," Lavender nodded, trying to walk up the never-ending stairs without hurting her side too much.

Except that it wasn't like Hogwarts because there was no Padma and she was afraid of going to bed and afraid to go to dinner because she didn't know what faces she _wouldn't_ see and it scared her. She wasn't excited about every day as an opportunity to look good for boys and she wanted to eat a large slab of meat despite the fact that she had been on a strictly vegetarian diet her entire 6th year.

Nothing was the same as Hogwarts anymore.

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><p>The entire first day at Grimmauld place Lavender slept: through both dinner and everyone else going to bed. By the time she got up it was late at night and there was no sound of anyone else but she had the intense desire to drink tea for a sense of normality, no matter how small. She had slept an entire day and still felt tired because of how weak her sleep had been.<p>

Lavender got up out of her bed and slipped on some shoes because her feet were freezing against the wood floor. She felt like she should have the way of the building memorized just by how many times she had been informed of the layout and all the times others had talked about the building, but she still hadn't ever been there. She suddenly wished she had paid more attention when Mrs. Weasley had spoken a mile a minute about where everything and everyone was.

The stairs seemed like a safe bet to at least take her _somewhere_, away from the bedrooms and the bed with the twisted covers everywhere but _on_ the bed. Lavender remembered Mrs. Weasley saying _something_ about a kitchen and she was pretty certain that it was on the first floor so she walked down the stairs precariously to avoid as many creaks as she could and not wake anyone up.

After walking into a few wrong rooms she walked into the right one on the third try. She took a small amount of enjoyment out of finding it by herself and laughed ever so quietly as she thought "third times the charm". Lavender knew it was silly to even be excited about such a small thing but she figured she should get her enjoyment where she can, and if it comes from finding the kitchen she doesn't think there's anything too wrong with that.

Her steps made small pattering noises against the wood as she walked towards the stove and the pot filled with water just waiting to boil her a hot cup of tea. The pot was already warm, though, and she suddenly looked around the kitchen in worry. It had to be at least five hours since everyone had gone to bed, who was in the kitchen? Her breath calmed back down when she noticed George sitting at the table, completely oblivious to anyone but himself and his cup of tea.

Lavender put a tea packet into a cup (which she also had to do a little bit of searching for) and then poured the water in. As she began walking she contemplated leaving George to his reverie before realizing that she had no desire to go back to her quiet, mangled bed to drink her tea by herself. Changing her path, she walked back over to the kitchen table and sat down across from George.

"George?" she spoke quietly, trying to not startle him too badly but still wanting him to acknowledge her presence.

His head snapped up from his self-stirring cup of tea (which, Lavender made note of, still looked full and hardly drunken). "Lavender?" he croaked.

She suddenly realized how horrible he looked. His hair was a mess that would make Granger cringe and his eyes were bloodshot. Bags under his eyes showed that he probably hadn't slept in days (if at all) and a pity took over Lavender as she noticed the sense of lose and depression in his eyes. "Couldn't sleep?" she asked, despite already knowing the answer.

"No," he croaked out again, his voice gravelly sounding. "You?"

"Oh, I can sleep," she stated. "It's the sleeping I don't like, the nightmares…" she trailed off. She didn't know _why_ she told him this. George and here were never close, she could count the amount of times they had talked on one hand, but he was there and she felt he probably wanted someone to talk to as much as she did.

"I know what you mean," he stared off into space. "Have you ever liked someone you didn't think you would?" he asked randomly, catching Lavender off guard.

"Yes," she nodded in reply. Her mind went to a redhead, though a different one. One who was once her boyfriend, one she realized she missed every day he was gone from Hogwarts because she really did love him, one she tried to tell the truth to before getting mauled by a werewolf man. "George?"

"Yea?"

"Could you tell me, no one else will…" she trailed off. "Could you tell me who was lost?"

He looked sad, at her or at the world (she figured both) she wasn't entirely sure of. At first she thought he wasn't going to tell her either, but she could tell he thought not knowing was worse than knowing, so he spoke. The list was long, and sometimes he would stop. Sometimes it was because he needed to collect his breath because it hurt to say it and sometimes it was because he couldn't remember the name. Every once in a while he looked even more pained than he already did, because a person had died, in the name of good…

…and how could he not remember them?

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><p>"Lavender?" someone knocked on her door. It was a familiar voice, one that made her heart jump and an unstoppable smile spread across her face.<p>

"Come in, Ron," she stated, sitting up in her bed more so that she wasn't awkwardly lying down when he came in.

Ron entered, the same head of red hair and crooked smile. His nose was freckled and he looked tanner than the last time she had seen him. He was the same but different and she found that she didn't mind. He was still _Ron,_ still the boy she loved. How could she not still love him?

"How are you feeling?" he asked as he sat down on the bed next to hers that Hermione slept in.

"Good, really good. I'm getting better every day," she stated optimistically. "One of these days I'll apparently be able to go for a long walk without assistance."

"That's good, and the scars…" he trailed off with an unfinished question.

"They won't ever go away," she stated bitterly, a stuffy silence taking over the room

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have-"

"No, it's ok," she stated.

"Lavender, when Hermione found you, well, she told me that you said my name, right before you passed out," he wrung his hands together. "Why?"

"I feel like you know why."

"I don't," he told her.

"I said your name because before the black took over and everything went out and it was dark I was thinking of you. I had been trying to find you, to tell you…"

"Tell me what?" he said anxiously.

"Tell you that I loved you," she answered. "Not like 6th year where I was in love with being in love and just wanted to be with you because it made me feel good, but because I realized that during those six months away from you that it hurt to not be able to see you and talk to you. I missed you, and after some 'soul-searching' I realized it was because I love you. I don't expect you to return the feelings or anything, I know you love Hermione, but I…I thought you deserved to know at the very least."

Ron stared at her like he was looking for an answer he couldn't seem to find. He opened his mouth and spoke, "Hermione and I kissed at the Final Battle."

"Oh," she said. "Ok, I wish you two the best."

"Hermione and I kissed," he started again, "but…we did it again, after the battle died down and it was just us and no death and danger and…well…it wasn't right. I think honestly that she's falling in love with George, with all the time she spends with him these days, and I found that I don't mind. Because- because kissing her didn't compare in any way to kissing you," he finished.

Lavender snapped her head up and looked at him expectantly: did he mean what she thought he meant? Did he return the feelings she had for him? Never in a million years had she thought hearing that from Ron could make her feel so full and happy and good. She wanted to dance and sing (two activities she was positively horrible at) and she didn't even know if he meant what she thought he meant.

"Does that mean…" she trailed off, hoping he would finish the sentence for her.

"I don't know if I love you," he answered honestly, "but I would very much like to help you take a long walk if you're up to it. I think that, I think that there is a large part of me that still cares for you."

"Ok," she nodded. "Can you help me up? I'd really like to take that walk now."

Ron grabbed her arms and pulled her up out of the bed carefully, like a china doll he didn't want to break. She was so fragile, he realized, and he didn't want to break her anymore than she already had been. Lavender stood next to him and felt safe as she looked up at his comforting face with the same amount of freckles that had always been there.

"Ready?" Ron asked as he grabbed her hand and looped his fingers between them, not letting go.

"Ready," she smiled back. Ron looked at her and gave her a small kiss on the top of her head as they got to the door to test it out and Lavender closed her eyes for a brief second, reveling in his feel and touch and smell.

"You're still beautiful, you know, with the scars. You've never looked more beautiful, honestly," he stated.

And, as a smile broke out across her face, she realized that she believed him.


End file.
